I know I’m allowed to be biased, but I have the two best sons in the world!
They help me around the house without me needing to nag them (most the time!), like emptying the dishwasher, drying the dishes, putting the rubbish outside, vacuuming, wiping the tables, making their beds and cleaning up their toys. Even if they are in the middle of watching their favourite TV program, they realise that they forgot to do some of their chores, and quickly get it done before I realise! Not that they think I’m an ogre, they just know that we are a team, and all team members help out.
Each night, we have some wind down time, and they compete a little to see who can have ‘more’ of me to cuddle. I sit in the middle of the couch, and they sit either side, or lie down over the top of me, put their heads on my lap or their feet on my lap, just happy knowing I’m there. We laugh, we hug each other, we tickle each other and we have fun. Sometimes the competing can get a little overwhelming when one wants to take over my lap, while the other one already has his head on it, so I have to divide my body in half and show the boundaries of who gets what… one gets my left side, the other my right.
My boys are full of joy! When we do things together, their little voices are so appreciative of being able to enjoy life. It could be anything from choosing which take-out food we are getting for the night, to choosing which movie we go to, putting their favourite song on the iPod or even a simple walk down the street to enjoy the fresh air. Their little voices say ‘Thank You Mum!’ or “You’re the Best Mum Ever!’ and I get the best smiles and the most appreciative hugs from them. And they don’t care that they are 11 and 9 years old, as some kids at that age think that hugging their mum is a little wrong. They won’t kiss me, and I’m OK with that, but they love giving hugs.
They always surprise me… On Monday, it was the first day back at school, and they are usually awake before me. When I woke up, they had already dressed themselves for school, had breakfast, made their lunches (which they never do!), made their beds, cleaned up their playroom and emptied the dishwasher, not to mention brushed their teeth and had their bags packed! I said “Who are you and what have you done with my boys?” They smiled, and were very proud of their achievements, wanting to know what else they could do.
I hear of stories that they look after each other in the playground at school, and sometimes even share the same friends. They do everything together – play with their Bey Blades, play Wii or games on their iPads, they ride on they scooters together, play hockey, sit and draw together and even create concoctions in the kitchen! Even though they do sometimes get annoyed with each other, they do show a deep respect for each other and cherish that they have each other.
I’m not saying my boys don’t have problems… as they do. My little one has learning disabilities (and I’m allowed to call them ‘disabilities’ now, not ‘differences’ as his learning tests are on the bottom rung) 🙁 And my oldest boy can be annoyingly happy, and sometimes I worry that he’s covering up something that he’s not voicing (like comedians do… you know how sometimes they enjoy making other people laugh, but they have a sad existence themselves). And they know that I work really hard and can be overwhelmingly tired, so they understand when not to ask for too much. They are seeing a counsellor to deal with issues with their father and the concept of family, and since they have been doing it, it’s like a weight has lifted off their shoulders. They know that we, as a threesome, need to stick together and always be there for each other, as no one else will be… no one else cares for us as we care for each other. And that’s all that matters.
I love my two boys and will do anything for them to make them the best boys they can be. I’ve already been told that their maturity level in handling things at school supersedes that of most their peers, and they do ask the deepest questions and are willing to learn about life. I think that because I have always told them that I will be honest with them, about anything – sex, friends, family, how a car works, what a word means, the right decorum, why people act a certain way, the generation gap, etc.. they respect everything that I do for them and don’t push any boundaries.
I know that time will come where other influences will dominate their thoughts – girls, work, friends, etc… but I truly hope that they understand that I do give them more freedom than many other parents, that boundaries are set for their safety, and that respect is a two way street… if they respect the boundaries I put on them, the boundaries will be lessened sooner in time.
But at the moment, they are the two most beautiful boys I could ask for… I hope it lasts a lifetime!