How do you recreate the best version of ourself?
Most of us have had that moment in life where we think, ‘I’d love to go back to when I was XX, life was so good then, I was the happiest I’ve ever been”. So what’s stopping you? You can’t turn back the hands of time or time travel (yet), but you can reinvent that sense of inner happiness in your life now.
The happy you was no doubt the inner you, at a time when life was less complicated and before the challenges of life starting weighing you down. So how do you get back there? Lay the foundations for the best version of you to grow on, here’s a few steps to get you going in the right direction.
First though, ask yourself this question – Would you want your children/loved ones to live this same life. Or would you like something better/happier for them? Lead by example.
Self-reflection means ‘serious thought about one’s character and actions’. When we reach that point in our lives where we aren’t satisfied with life, then that is the universe (or whatever you believe in) telling you that you are ready to make some changes in your life for the better. You can choose to ignore the nudge you are getting, but nothing will change if you ignore it and you will have no-one but yourself to blame. Self-reflection may make you aware of the unconscious self destructive behaviour that has shaped your life. Are you ready to put yourself under the microscope?
“I can’t do it”
“I’m not smart enough to get a better job”
“I can’t leave him, no one else will ever want me”
Negative self talk can also be how we accept compliments. If someone says you look great in that outfit, replying with ‘oh this old thing’, is a form of negative self talk.
The start of finding your inner self is changing how you talk to yourself. Stop yourself before you say something negative. Replace it with something positive about yourself, make it habit to talk yourself up not down. Won’t be long before the negative habit has been replaced by positive self talk.
Did your mum ever say “if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all”?
To be the best version of yourself you need to get rid of negative talk completely, both from others and from yourself. Remember, like attracts like. You are in control of the type of energy you attract.
Don’t be a people pleaser
If you are a people pleaser, you no doubt put others first. Whilst it’s nice to think of others, don’t allow yourself to become a doormat. People tend to pick-up on your need to be liked and can and will take advantage of you if you allow it. You will be amazed what happens when you put yourself first, you are throwing it out there that you are important and guess what, people will start treating you that way.
Procrastinators sabotage themselves from becoming the best versions of themselves.
- Make a list of all the things you loved about the time you were the best version of yourself.
- Make a list of all the things you don’t like about the current version of you.
- Eliminate the things you don’t like.
- Start doing more of the things you love.
When you were the best version of you, were you happy with the way you looked? Did you have long flowing hair or a cute bob cut? Who’s style did you idolise or emulate – was it Elle MacPherson for her natural beauty or Madonna for her contentious fashion? Could you develop a 2016 version of that same style? Do what it takes to reinvent your inner beauty into the person you felt most comfortable with. Your confidence will soar if you feel you are looking your best and after working through the self-reflection, your inner beauty will shine through.
Remember, maybe the journey isn’t so much about becoming anything. Maybe it’s about un-becoming everything that isn’t really you so that you can be who you were meant to be in the first place.